Welcome to the Wammy House
by Reanna-Kris-Katelyn
Summary: What happens when L’s little sister comes from Japan to spend a month in England, more specifically the Wammy House! Complete summary inside because I'm mean like that


RKK: **pouts**

ABW: What's wrong?

RKK: My DN fonts won't work with punctuation… Well, besides the spiffy Near one…

ABW: O.o… but that's HARD to read!!!

RKK: Not as bad as Ryuuku's (Going off translated manga here, Manga Fox FTW!)

ABW: So… what's this all about?

RKK: I'm going to give the DN Characters hell… At the Wammy House **smirks evilly **

ABW: I'll grab the popcorn… And your damn bunny…

RKK: I GET L BACK!? THANK YOU AMI!!! ** Glomps her plot bunny in loves**

ABW: **enters with popcorn **MELLO! SINCE RKK DOESN'T LIKE YOU DO THE DISCLAIMERS!

Mello: **puppy pouts **Neither RKK or ABW own Death Note… If RKK did, I know I wouldn't be around… (RKK in the background: I don't hate you I just like messing with you!) If ABW owned it… L would live and it would be SMUT! **Adds in a whisper: "And Near wouldn't make moves on MY Matty-kins" **AND the only thing RKK owns is R Lawliet, her made up who is trying to take my Matty-kins…

Rating: T (Because the whole cast is perverted and WOW Shouldn't be played by sugar high children…)

Summary: What happens when L's little sister comes from Japan to spend a month in England, more specifically the Wammy House! How will the WHB deal with a girl who sleeps like the dead, plays MMOs better than Matt, throws toys at Near, and constantly steals Mello's candy on TOP of calling them ALL by their real names? Insanity ensues!

_**Welcome to the Wammy House!**_

Near, Mello and Matt all stood outside the Wammy House waiting for their special visitor.

"I wonder if she's cute…" Near said aloud in thought.

"Can't be cute if she's L's sister…" Mello stated in a matter-of-fact tone.

"I just hope she stays away from my chips… Or she's at least FWIW IRL that she has an Int. of at least 20." Matt said lighting his evening cig. Mello stared at the redheaded chain smoking, pocky toting, MMO playing SOB that was his best friend.

"In ENGLISH Matt…" Mello asked with a bored look nibbling on a chocolate bar.

"FTW, Mello! You need to play WoW with me more!" Matt said with a smirk.

"Uhhh.. For the Turkey? And… Winners or Whiners? No thanks Matt…" Near said crouching down and nibbling his thumb like L. Mello turned to yell at Near for being mean to his Matty-kins, when a car pulled up and a purple long haired girl stepped out. Like Mello she had a chocolate bar in her mouth, like Matt she had goggles on, and like Near she had L's Posture.

"Who the hell are you?" Mello asked, the girl lifted the goggles from her eyes and quirked the part of her fair face where an eyebrow should have been.

"I could ask you the same thing Blondie… Or should I say… Mihael Keehl…" she smirked then smiled brightly as L came out of the Wammy House.

"R!" L said excitedly as his sister ran to him and embraced him tightly.

"Frère! J'ai eu le meilleur voyage!" The girl responded in French, her name now known as R, L's little sister.

"Trans. Kthnxbai…" Matt muttered taking a suitcase from the driver, Mello followed suite with a scowl. Once inside R was lead to L's room where oddly he had bunk beds.

"You get the top one R, I'm not fond of heights…" L said giving his sister a look of, "I really don't…" R smirked, climbed almost monkey-like up the ladder and sat like a dog on the bed.

"Oi! Mail Jeevas! Can I have my suitcase, kthnx!" She shouted down to Matt.

"Srsly? You know our IRL names?" Matt asked starting to climb the ladder with the suitcase. Once he was able to hand it to her he did so and she grinned.

"Rly I do!" She said nodding vigorously.

"We have two Matt's now… Except one is a girl and one is a boy… and One calls us by out nicknames and one calls us by our real names…" Near observed from the floor by L's feet.

"Ah! That I do Nate River!" R said draping half herself off the top bunk to look at the white haired young man.

"You scare me…" Near said looking up at her.

"Well, R DOES have that effect on people…" L said and grinned at his sister. "Come on, Wammy's making dinner… You ARE hungry aren't you?" L asked and as if on cue R's stomach growled loudly.

"Hai, so desu ne!" R responded in Japanese.

"How many languages does she know?" Mello asked L making L smirk.

"Fifteen…"

--One hour Later--

"LOL that's not half as Über as DotA! DotA is ZOMG Über!" R said to Matt who was sitting right next to her. Neither were eating much, more like debating WHO was the better MMO player.

"WoW Pwns DotA ANY DAY! ROFL, PPL are just naive to the wonders of WoW!" Matt exclaimed pounding his fork on the table causing the rest of the Wammy Boys to stare as R got in his face.

"Are you claiming you're better at WoW than me because I play DotA?! Just you wait Mail Jeevas, I'll show you you're the Über n00b!" R said before poking Matt on the forehead with her butter knife.

"Stop trying to kill Matt!" Mello said noting this was indeed the twentieth time R had poked Matt somewhere with her knife.

-- STOP!--

Okay, I bet it is as annoying to you literate readers as it is for me to write it… To tell the truth I'm having to use WoW's glossary to make Matt sound like a total MMO geek… As well as making R sound like one… I'm sorry if it offends any of my readers, but we ALL must endure… For the sake of Matt's awesomeness… Oh, and R calls the Wammy Trio their real names because she's trying to piss them off… (For some reason it doesn't piss Near off…)

-Read onward-

R shot Mello a venomous look.

"Who told you to butt in Mihael?" R asked before throwing her knife at him. The knife bounced off his arm and Mello pulled his gun from his pants, this made R giggle. "Wow… Mihael… How do you manage to keep that thing in your pants? It's so big!" R said totally oblivious she had just made the whole room turn red from an unintended innuendo about Mello's downstairs. Matt fell from his chair half choking half laughing, Near buried his face in his hands, L snickered, Watari shook his head in embarrassment, and Mello looked at the gun and blushed before sticking it back down said pants, not realizing the way he placed it made it look like he had a massive boner. This caused R to fall over and join Matt on the floor.

"T-T-Total FTW!" Matt stammered from the floor.

"Yesh! Total FTW!" R said snickering and climbing up her chair to stand.

--Four Hours Later--

"You sure this is a good idea Mello?" Near asked quietly as the snuck into the room belonging to L and R… Thankfully L was in a different room playing DDR for some reason, and R was snoring away on the top bunk.

"She INSULTED me!" Mello hissed quietly at Near. Near shrugged but watched as Mello climbed up the ladder and held down his hand to Near. "Scissors!" Near handed him a pair of scissors that a second grader would be given, and Mello set to work giving R a new hairstyle.

--The Next Morning--

"Mihael and Nate! You two are 'effing n00bs I swear FWIW I'm going to strang-!" Screamed R as she looked at herself in the mirror but stopped mid-sentence as she was grabbed from behind by none other than Matt.

"YOU ME WoW, NOW!!!" Matt said in a crazed tone putting a green headset on her head, the plug to the computer over her shoulder. She gave him a look of "Don't you see my head has been BUTCHERED!?" Matt shrugged. "You can use my laptop and SUB in yours and L's room… I'm gunna SUB in my room…" Matt said with an almost evil laugh. (SUB means Set Up Base)

Five minutes later R was in a bunker made of pillows and blankets on L's bunk, Matt's laptop loading World of Warcraft. She turned on Ventrilo, then heard Matt snicker in her ears via the headsets they were both wearing and the program.

"Shut up Mail…" R said moodily running her hand through her new v-cut courtesy of Mello.

"Alright, I'm going to be at BRS, AFAIK there are no Mob… No NPC… and no PCs… Well… Where I… OMG WTF!?!" Matt exclaimed, "I just got pwned by a fucking Hume!" This caused R to laugh.

"Beat that n00b!" R said then burst out laughing, "Dude! Mail Jeevas WTF you doin' with that THING!?" R asked watching Matt's avatar basically getting raped by a monster that had been summoned by R's avatar.

"Nuthin' I shouldn't be doin' R-Chan!" Matt said sarcastically.

"R…Are you AWARE you and Matt sound perverted?" Watari asked peeking into R's fort.

"And I'M called the pervert..." L's voice said from the other room with a tone of extreme annoyance. R merely smirked and took out a chocolate bar and took a big bite giving Watari a wink. At that moment everyone heard Mello scream.

"THAT BITCH TOOK MY CANDY!!!" Mello screamed at the top of his lungs. R heard Matt snicker via Ventrilo.

"Yes, Mail Jeevas, what's so funny?" R asked munching happily on the chocolate stolen from Mello.

"Because you just pwned Mello's chocolate…" Matt said with a snicker.

"LOL that isn't the half of it…" R crooned with a grin.

--Two Weeks Later--

"OW! STOP R!" Whined Near as his anime action figures whizzed by his head.

"No! You, Nate River, stole my TWINKIE!" R hollered throwing Optimus Prime at Near hitting him neatly between the eyes. This caused Near to pick up a GI Joe and rush forward brandishing the figure like a sword. R countered with pelting him with Legos making Near play baseball using his GI Joe as a bat. "ADMIT YOU ATE MY TWINKY NATE RIVER!" R said tackling him and wrestling him on the floor.

"I'm Not EVEN going to ask R what she is doing to Near…" L said from the doorway. R and Near got to their feet, then Near to grabbed some Legos and throw them at L, R joining in, driving L from the doorway screaming in pain from the tiny plastic bricks.

-- Two minutes later--

Near, R, and Mello sat facing L and Watari in the living room Mello was glaring at R for he had stormed into Near's room demanding to know where his missing chocolate bars were only to be pelted with Legos by R and Near.

"R only has four days left here… Why can't you three get along?" Watari asked looking specifiacally at R who made a fish face.

"Mihael started it when I came here… He CUT MY HAIR!" R said pointing to her V-cut before feigning a pout, Mello and Near pantomiming gags behind her. L then pulled out handcuffs.

"Mello and R shall be handcuffed together for the next four days." L said with a smirk and promptly latched the cuffs to his sister and his oldest protégé.

-- Four Days Later--

"I'm going to miss the Wammy House…" R said as she, Mello, and Matt packed her suitcase.

"Why?" Asked Mello who suddenly had a liking for L's little sister.

"I'm going to miss messing with Mail, Nate, and you…" She said giving Mello a smile. Mello blinked.

"But don't you LIKE Matt?" Asked Mello asked suspiciously. This caused R to giggle maliciously.

"Mihael, take care of Mail for me… M'kay? You see if I wasn't a total Lesbian I'd have raped him when he was first telling me he could beat my ass at WoW…" R said with a smile. Mello and Matt stared with mouths agape.

"You're… A Lesbian?" Asked Mello and Matt at the same time. R nodded.

"Affirmative, Why do you think I play WoW with a MALE avatar?" R asked and Matt stared as Near entered.

"Your car is here…" Near said quietly before he held up the very GI Joe that he had picked up to fend off R's Lego attack with, "And I want you to have this…" Near said with a blush.

"Thank you Nate…" R said taking the GI Joe gently and gave Near a kiss on the cheek before giving Mello and Matt one as well. "See you three next year, Mail, Mihael, and Nate…" She said picking up her now closed suitcase and making her exaunt from the Wammy House until the next year.

RKK: **smirks **Who saw that ending?

ABW: ME!

LPB: ME!

Mello: Not ME!

RKK: **goes to Mello and noogies him** I told you I didn't hate you… **steals chocolate bar from his grip with a smile** ThnxKBai! **Dashes off**


End file.
